Thank God for a NEW year!!

           Today I am praising God with all my might, because I have hope for a new beginning, new strength and a healthy new year. My new Chemo treatments are kinder and more gentle. I have felt almost normal again. What a relief! I am certainly aware that even these "kinder" treatments will take its toll on my stamina and energy, but not having that burning, nausea on a daily, hourly basis will be a welcomed reprieve. My hope is to feel strong enough to pick up some slack around here and start feeling like a mom again! 

    I sit here in awe of the beautiful lessons my family is learning through this journey. Just this very minute Maddie and Layni walked in my room asking how I felt today and then in Maddie's very nurturing way, she asks if I need anything! They have all truly stepped up to rallly around me and take care of me. What am I saying??? I am the one who is learning lessons from them. I am learning from them how to care for and nurture people when they are broken and unable to care for themselves. They have taught me so much by their attentive care for me, which they learned by watching their DAD!!! What a man!  

    I am very aware that without this experience, I may never have understood the depths of my love for these people God placed in my life! Would I still be waking up each morning with a casual greeting for the day, not realizing the awesome beauty of my life. So it is with deep respect that I thank God for this time of suffering, for it has enabled me to go deep inside and allow myself to be and feel all that is within me. Although this is by far the most difficult time of my life, and some of it would be better forgotten, I hope I can always recall the desperation in my heart while I searched for  God's love through the family and friends who are carrying me through this sweet, and frightening  time. I didn't have to search very far, for he is right there beside me every step of the way. 

   I have 11 more treatments of Taxol and then 6 weeks of radiation, so we are not near done, but somehow today I feel a greater sense of hope, a place to start anew!  My spirit has been refreshed by two days of NO Nausea!!!  

     I have included pics of our pizza outing on Monday....La Pizzaria!!! yummo!! Blanche's boyfriend Matt was with us. I was telling Blanche the other day how it feels like Matt hasn't really met her "real" mom! She said he saw my beautiful wine rack in the living room and asked if I liked wine!!! Three months ago that would have been a stupid question! But one day soon I won't feel the need to curl up in a ball and watch the house twirl around me. Every day brings me closer and closer to better health and a lively spirit. I am wishing all of you a super new year, with blessings of abundance  beyond reason!  

"But as for me, I will enter your house through the abundance  of your steadfast love and mercy; I will worship toward and at your holy temple in reverent fear and awe of You."

Psalm 5:7